Forty-three field goal attempts. Thirty-six made free throws. Eighty-three points!? FOR THE LOVE OF SPOTTED COW AND ALL THOSE DELICIOUS FROZEN PORK CUTLETS AT KWIK TRIP! It’s Bam Adebayo, big man from Miami Heat, who put up a second-highest scoring game in NBA history on Tuesday night. Passed Kobe Bryant with 81 points back in ’06 against Toronto Raptors? Yeah, sure did! Not quite Wilt Chamberlain and his famous 100-point night but still one heck of an achievement by Bammy.
Now I was thinkin’ about this the other day at Culver’s – you know where Michael-Vincent gets those huge bucket list burgers from – and how some teams struggle to hit triple digits. Giannis Antetokounmpo and his Bucks, just last week, couldn’t manage it against Boston Celtics in a 108-81 beatdown. But Bammy Adebayo didn’t have any of that nonsense on his mind Tuesday night.
Bam was goin’ for broke like Blake after five root beers from Culver’s! Thirty-one points in the first quarter? That’s more than Kevin Love had against Portland Trail Blazers back in 2016. Forty-three field goals, forty-six made free throws? First time anyone has done that since… well, nobody actually but it’s still crazy talkin’ about those numbers!
And Bam wasn’t even satisfied with just set-tin’ records for his team; no sirree not this guy! He set Heat franchise marks for most points in a quarter (31), half (43) and game (83). That LeBron James, though – he was the previous record holder at 61 against Bobcats back in ’12.
But Bammy wasn’t done yet. No way, Jose! You see, prior to this night of nights his career high had been just a mere 41 points. I mean, that’s cute and all but not exactly what you’d call “a whole lotta nothin’.” And before Tuesday, there were only ten other times in the history of the NBA where some big boy scored seventy or more. This dude is company.
Now here’s somethin’, Bammy also joined Wilt Chamberlain as one and only players to score twenty made field goals and twenty-five free throws – that’s just a whole lotta makin’ it happen, if you catch my drift. Oh yeah, he got himself 7 three-balls in there for good measure on 22 tries.
I gotta say though… all this talk about Bam Adebayo puttin’ up points like there’s no tomorrow leaves me kinda bewildered; dude shot only twenty of forty-three from the field! I mean, that’s less than fifty percent and still managed to get seventy-odd. If a guy can do that in my fantasy league at Culver’s, he’d be on the bench by halftime.
And what really gets my goat is how some teams don’t even score eighty points like they’re clockin’ out or somethin’. Bam Adebayo’s night puts me to think about all those games this season where nobody could manage it. Now that I got a hankerin’, you want another root beer float, Blake?
One-Ry Out.